The healing process on our side. In time.
Healing is a complex process. Complex says here it cannot be analysed, and process says that time is involved in healing. But we can dare a look at what is at play. Below you will find themes that may have an answer for part of your healing. Feel your read through, let you inspire and take your own with you!
Estimated total reading time 28 minutes, the part about time 15 minutes, the rest in parts at will.
Content
Introduction
But before we start let’s remember the framework we’re in. Me in writing and you in reading this. This thing is about connection, here between us solitary twins and our timeless twins. I covered the part of our twins in timelessness in Plunge into a timelessness. Timeless consciousness is a very different playing field than our consciousness in time here. The difference is time, so we should look closely at time first to get an insight into what we are dealing with. If we deal with time with awareness, it becomes our ally. All other themes follow time.
Our end of the connection to our timeless twin line is part of our territory and our responsibility. Any ally who can help with the set-up should be welcome, right? Any ally who can dance for joy is even better. Our end of this connection is not only our territory and responsibility, it is our adventure, our joy and deep happiness. Can time dance? You’re going to discover, it’s your territory and your adventure. Enjoy.
Trust in time
Our problem-solving mind is stuck in time
Time is a funny thing. We cannot lay our hands on it, let alone our minds. It seems to be a bit of a mystery when we look at it, doesn’t it? This promises to get interesting! Now, we know from experience that we are only in the present moment. The famous “here and now”. Of course, our problem-solving mind is constantly revolving around the past or the future. Exactly the same problem-solving mind loves to solve riddles. Actually it even creates a lot of riddles to keep us busy solving them. But this is another story. In short, the problem-solving mind is good at linear things like past-present-future or what button we have to press at the mobile in order to get the weather forecast.
Of course, it can also be much more complicated, like launching a satellite into orbit or keeping track of all the administrative aspects of daily family life. These are all complicated things and can therefore be analysed. But still, our mostly linear problem-solving mind is caught in time. It cannot comprehend time, it just experiences time. If we’re trapped inside something, we can’t fully comprehend it, can we? The problem-solving mind is trapped in the linearity of cause and effect. It perceives time as a linear thing. Agreed? We’ll come back to that, I promise!
Our higher mind observes without interfering
But we also have a higher mind that observes that this is happening. We sometimes catch ourselves wandering off in our thoughts, don’t we? Or we observe how we fall back into the same old trains of thought again and again. This observing is our higher mind in action. Let’s stick to this term, more differentiation is another story again. Just in a short note see here.
Our higher mind can handle complex things like healing processes, or conscious breathing while cooking a complicated meal for the first time. It is able to juggle our longing to be seen in a relationship and want to be alone at the same time. We can learn or perceive individual elements that seem to contradict each other, and yet it doesn’t interfere. Rather, these elements can complement and enrich each other; the whole is more than the sum of its parts. In the above, alone time can enrich sharing when we are seen, and the other way round. So when we read in this mode, all the themes below become building blocks for something bigger: our healing process.
Consciousness does knit socks
Our higher mind is connected to our consciousness, it has a say in when and how we become more conscious. Do you agree with me when I say that you are more conscious now than you were at the age of eleven? So our consciousness is expanding over time, isn’t it? Of course, we can get older and stay the same and not get any wiser. But usually we bring consciousness into time. Yes, you read that right: Bringing consciousness into time. Let me explain. Say, we are knitting a sock, we knit stitch by stitch and row by row until it is finished. Then we say: “Wow, we created this sock!”
But that is one-sided, it is only the perspective of mass and space. In this universe, time is the basis for mass and space. And all socks belong in the universe, I’m positive! So we could also say that we have brought this sock into time. If you’ve ever watched someone knitting, you’ll probably see the point. Each stitch is brought into time, stitch by stitch, moment by moment. In a similar way, we bring consciousness into time. Moment by moment, since we arrived here in this life. Are you still with me? But where does this transition from consciousness into time take place? And how does it happen? Imagine a door frame through which consciousness passes into time. That’s easy to picture.
We are door frames
The place of this door frame is, of course, in the here and now. There is nothing else if we look at it open-minded, right? This door frame does neither exist in the past nor in the future, just to be clear. So, we are at the door frame any given moment. To be correct, we ourselves are the door frame. Okay? Or do you mean that consciousness simply tumbles around us and randomly passes us by, and we just stand in the door frame? There is no door frame apart from us, at least no other door frame we have to take care for. We are door frames that bring consciousness into time.
We are open questions
It is up to us how and what kind of consciousness we bring into time. We have free will in our lives, no doubt about that. We can create as much chaos in our lives as we want. Or we can create a work of art of pure joy and fulfilment. The choice is ours. To add yet another ingredient: Each of us is a question of life itself and our life is the answer we give. The question is really open, life is very curious and looks through our eyes with sympathy. If you are reading here, a key ingredient of the question you are is your timeless twin. And with it the connection between the both of you.
This is a big question, isn’t it? Big questions provide big answers, mind you! Once again, if you are reading here, you have lived your answer up to here in the time where you discovered your timeless twin and your connection to him or her. This is a very big answer! All of this lies in the answer and the question that you are. There will be more to come in time, because you too are a door frame. All we have to take care of is to be the door frame. Time will bring us everything that is necessary and best suited. It is our ally, in other words. What, you think that’s a bit over the top? Let me take you on a short tour. Thank you for following me.
It boils down to our attitude
Being the door frames that we are, we are consciousness frontiers too. What happens is new every moment, brought anew into time. That’s how life does knit stitch by stitch, and we all are part of life itself, agreed? Life is not out to get us, and it is neither random nor meaningless. As I see it. Life is consciousness that is ever-expanding, and so are we, of course. We are part of it, remember, so we are both cause and effect of expansion. Is that a bit much for you all at once? Please bear with me, thanks.
In a nutshell it boils down to our inner attitude towards life. The way I see it: We are always in the right place with the right circumstances for the consciousness we are about to bring into time. I am not always happy with this insight, but it is a deep truth that I know and experience. Please have an intimate talk with life to sort this out for yourself. It’s about trust, deep down, in your foundations. It takes time to trust, and it takes trust in time. When looking back on your life, what do you see?
Right time, right place – a one-off event?
Sometimes we get an insight that we have been at right place at right time and did the right thing. That is a strange attitude from our perspective that we follow here. This is not a one-off event, but the rule without exception. I hope we all can look back and realise that life has gifted us with opportunities. Sometimes the chances were disguised as bad luck, misfortune or sheer failures. But how often has it catapulted us into something completely new and exciting? Or how often have we found ourselves in a nerve-wracking lap of honour that we set up ourselves while we thought we were lucky? And then we have learnt not to do it again? Can we agree for the moment that life happens for us and through us?
Time is our ally
Now, here it comes as promised. Can we agree that we are the door frames that are always in the right place and under the right circumstances for the stitch of the moment? Yes? Then time will do the rest! Here I must perhaps remind us that time is also part of all-encompassing life. When we trust time, we trust life. That’s a very big thing! Big questions and big answers are the playing field of our higher mind, and that includes door frames too. Here comes awareness into play, a state of openness towards thoughts, feelings and senses from a non-interfering, observing inner place. It can allow intuition or experience of phenomena. Awareness is a state in which our higher mind loves to play.
Introduction to the fitness centre
In the fitness centre of the higher mind it is all about awareness. Getting more aware is key. To be a door frame in awareness makes all the difference. What do we need to do to become more aware? Just be the door frame of course. Time will do the rest. Time is our ally, remember? Trust in time, it’s as simple as that! We are in the fitness centre of the higher mind at any given moment, just trust in time again. When we have a look around in our life at exactly this very moment: this is our best suited fitness centre for our higher mind. We might like it or not, but it is. We are free to change it for the better so that we feel happier in our circumstances.
That’s what expanding of consciousness is all about. A change for the better, so that we feel freer to be ourselves and find more inner peace. It is ultimately a loving consciousness. The challenges will not disappear, we will grow with them and they with us. Growth means expanding beyond the boundaries of our present. This will not end when we step out of time. So make yourself comfortable right where you are now, relax and trust in time. Ask your timeless twin about expanding of consciousness, because he or she is your first port of call for all insights concerning these topics. Trust your timeless twin too!
The quality of time
One last swivel before we summarise here. We probably all know places that we like and others that we don’t like. For example, places in nature, in cities or in the countryside. They are unique to us and can change over time. In short, these places go along with a quality of space, right? You’ve guessed it, where there is space, there is also time! And time has a quality in it as well. This quality changes over time, and it is unique to us as well. Time happens individually for us. Trust in time. An example? Imagine we are waiting for the result of an important and critical exam. Days feel like weeks. Do we remember our last happy holiday? The weeks passed like days.
But there is much more to this. It is not only about stretching or shortening the sense of time. There are qualities of time that call for change with action. Others recommend being quiet and listening inwardly. And then again, some demand rigorous enforcement of our external boundaries. So how can we hear what’s on? As promised above, we come back to our problem-solving mind that perceives time as a linear thing. When we listen to its answer to the above question, we don’t hear a thing but doubt and ridicule. We better forget about that. The quality of time is on the playing field of our higher mind. To hear its voice, we consciously become the door frame with awareness.
Conclusion to trust in time
And yes, immediately we are back in the fitness centre of our higher mind, right! What is the first station there? Yes, trust in time. We’re getting good at it, really ready for our workout! So look at the themes below as stations of the mentioned fitness centre.
Trust in time to recognise which topics are currently in demand. Listen with awareness while being the door frame. And let time do the rest. Trust in it. Be curious as life itself is and enjoy!
Higher mind-gym, locker room: The questions.
In the locker room
The chats in the locker rooms are casual and spontaneous. Sometimes we’re in the mood and other times we’re not. Sometimes we get deep insights in passing, other times the chat there is just annoying. It’s the same here. Pick your thoughts, says our higher mind. This starts in the locker room of the higher mind at the latest. I hope that we also take this saying to heart in our daily lives. A little tighter every day.
No chat for me today, I pass directly to Themed stations in the fitness room of our higher self.
Questions in the locker room
Each of our lives as solitary twins expresses an answer to the unique question that we are. Self-exploration and introspection are helpful tools to get on the trace here. Of course, this is not for the faint-hearted. But very rewarding in a live-giving way! I suggest for a start the chat “Why questions?” Enjoy.
Questions stick with us. They are more important than answers. True questions remain for a long time, sometimes for life. Our answers are changing and becoming more comprehensive. Who or what are we? This is a biggie. Maybe easier start with a lightweight. What am I grateful for today? At age of seven, our answer would possibly have been for our favourite ice cream. And today? Our answer is most likely different than then.
Of course, the question of gratitude is no lightweight. If we ask ourselves daily and write down three things we are grateful for, our life will change. Because the question casts a light on a space and lets us focus on that. The question is leading and keeps us on track. We will find temporary answers, that will expand our view more and more. So we better choose our questions carefully. They guide us.
On this website you will find many questions that are important for solitary twins. They are guiding and cannot be answered conclusively. The question about your dream of the womb is a prime example. The questions about it are guiding, shedding light on a space in which the answers gradually appear. With trust in time, we can take it more calmly. But without questions there is no light and no answers.
What a question! The most important … ! But to sort things out, sometimes it’s helpful to go to extremes. Replace “end of the day” with “end of our life.” Which skill will be most important to us then? From this perspective, it’s easy to weed out the less important. And this perspective is by no means morbid, hopeless or gloomy. Quite the opposite! It is life-giving in that it weeds out all life-limiting images. What does really count from that perspective? The skill to pile up millions of dollars or followers?
We could laugh here about this Sunday morning sermon. The skill to meditate silently in a barren cave for decades? Is that any better? Perhaps the pile-up-millions experiences the most fulfilling life. Perhaps the meditate-silently-decades experiences the feeling of a lost life. We cannot say. What we can say is what we consider to be the most important skill in our life. This is a personal question. Our life is the answer to it.
One thing is to know what is important to us. This is a question in itself. Our answers to it will hopefully change over time and keep track of our present view. Let’s pretend that we are aware of our priorities in life. How much space do we give this conscious knowledge? Where does this reflect in our daily life? How do we follow our guiding star? Is it a question of time? How to drop worn-out habits to allow time for what’s there now? Is it a question of doing the same in a completely new way? How to integrate our changed perspective in a familiar surrounding? The space we give to our current priorities in our life is a reliable gauge of our aliveness.
What’s the difference between parrot-like inner retelling and knowing by heart? How can we sense the difference in it? A good start might be to take a look at the farthest distance on earth: From the head to the heart. And vice versa, from the heart to the head. What helps head knowledge trickle out into our heart? What helps heart knowledge shine into our head? In what way does our heart learn or acquire knowledge? And our head? The mind in our head is not one, as we all experience, as I suppose. Which parts of our mind do really know? And how are they connected to the heart? What does “really know” mean? What we really know, we are. By being ourself, we act spontaneously. Out of the heart. Out of the moment. Out of ourself.
Sometimes we feel like trapped in a washing machine. We can’t make out what’s up and what’s down. Even the decision between two clearly recognizable different paths, such as left and right, is no longer possible. What is to be done, for heaven’s sake? Maybe nothing, for a short time, and turn inward. We have just lost our orientation. This presents us the opportunity of letting go old orientation markers that no longer fit. But positive thinking will not do the job. We feel insecure, because we have never been here before. Or we feel angry, lost, sad, mad, left alone and driven out of life. You name it. When we literally sit with our hurt, we become the question. We start to listen by embracing it. And our hurt will tell us what it is all about.
This can be learned. Or rather, we need to learn it in order to become saner and therefore more consious. Admittedly, this needs our whole being. Usually we find a way to dodge, or rather, a part of us offers sneaky ways to do so. Then we miss the answer. Being in the state of the washing machine is not about that it is “good again” as soon as possible. The point is that it first becomes clear. No matter what the consequences seem to be in our hurt state. When we become clear, we float upward. And then we know that we do. We have our new markers what’s up and what’s down.
Usually we start with just stumbling through life. We adopt the ways of our family, friends and social environment. We strive to be successful at it. But in successful at what? The wanting to be successful is a good thing, it drives us. But where to? And by what means? Is it a heart thing? Is it a mind thing? Is it a thing which includes both of them and more? As a suitable image, it’s like peeling out of ill-fitting armour. The armour helps for the start, to be safe and well protected. But it definitely hinders and closes in. How much protection do we need? How much freedom of movement do we want? Not to mention the clear sight and fresh air.
When we peel ourselves out of our ill-fitting armour, we leave the old ways behind. We become more and more ourselves. We get in touch with life more and more. How do we do this? Are there any helpful hints from life, other than trial and error? What and where to look for? We all explore these questions and live the answers. In one way or another. As solitary twins, we can tell a thing or two about it!
On this path to becoming ourselves, discovering our twin story is more than peeling ourselves out of ill-fitting armour. More apt here is the image of discovering that we have been standing on our heads the whole time. And now bringing our feet to the ground for the first time. his puts our whole view correctly orientated on the horizon, and everything else is turned upside down. What do we do with it? How do we deal with it? What helps us to dare to look?
Not really a question. It’s more of a kōan, a term in Japanese Zen Buddhism for sayings inaccessible to reason.
The moment, in the here and now. The problem-solving mind is definitely out of the question here. What remains? A lot, I would say. The problem-solving mind is only a very small part of us. Do the other parts also have a way of thinking? In a different sense?
There is a vast part of us that we are not aware of. The so-called shadow. The darkness. That’s a funny term for it, to be honest. The radiant shining light is in there. The brightness. But part of us is gloomy, so anything unknown deserves a term that expresses the fear of the unknown. The dark part of the mind is threatened by it. That’s all. Let’s change position for a second. If we were excluded from a central room to be forgotten. With us are the keys for the skylights and the connecting corridors. We hear the moaning and complaining in the enclosed room about the darkness and the confinement. What would we do? Keep still and stay silent? Or rather trying to signal that we are here? Perhaps as a last resort, manipulate the trapped party into moving toward the door they neither see nor suspect one bit?
What this image lacks: The excluded ones have influence and possibilities beyond all locked doors and walls. For them the enclosed room is the stage to be reached. They use the music, stage directions and theatrical turns to draw attention to themselves. If they are not heard, they turn up the volume. By any means. Once they are heard and acknowledged, they gladly join the team and the keys are handed over. We rarely have a clue of the dimension of how the excluded makes us stumble out of sheer desperation. How far would we go as the excluded to be able to hand over all our much-needed keys?
Now, think of our timeless twin and our connection. What comes to your mind?
Does that sound familiar? We know what the next step .. would be. But we somehow manage to sideline it. Yeah, yeah, I’ll get to that soon, is our inner conversation. We’re not talking about our endless to-do lists that keep us on our toes. On the contrary, these long lists tend to keep us from our next step that counts. What is the next step we are aware of right now? Are we in the flow and going with it? How would we notice when we are stalling needlessly? I remember a woman who knew she had to give up her partnership. With good reasons, all very clear. She is probably still there, and at the point where she knows.
What is knowledge? Is it a thing of our headspace? Or is it about acting accordingly and living our knowledge in everyday life? Of course, we could be cautious, not to say overanxious. Where does this lead to? What will take place after this step? And then after that? But life does not work like this. Why should life show us the step that comes after our upcoming step? Our next step needs our full attention. Like a door frame with awareness in time, exactly where we are with what is there.
In the world of arts, a valuable way of looking at things says that the exhibited object is only an insignificant by-product. Don’t try to talk this over to a seller-buyer-investor who does this business for a living. Nevertheless, this view is about what happens before and during the creation of the art object. For some artists, this is the most important thing. Again, there are others who are entirely dependent on the outcome. If their art object is highly valued and fetches astronomical sums, then they are successful. Can it be both?
What kind of artist are you? When you look at your life as an ongoing work of art, what is your view? Seller-buyer-investor or rather the artist who sees the value in the way of creating? Of course, we have to be able to make a living from what we do. But what does make the difference at the end of our life? That our artwork is in the Louvre or the Museum of Modern Art? Do we take that with us? Or is it not rather the lived experience that we have expressed in our lives something that was entirely ours? When we get our priorities right, we stop focusing on the by-products. This creates space for the real thing.
Themed stations
This is a collection of themes of life itself, in other words of consciousness. After all, we are in the fitness room of the higher mind. The entries below apply to everyone; we all deal with them, consciously or unconsciously. But here they are tailored to us solitary twins. I consider all the following stations worth mentioning for our connection with our timeless twin in time. Pick your thoughts yourself, enjoy!
Content of Themed stations
• Doubt
• Energetical sensitivity
• Timeless dimension
• Psychologically
• Bodily
Doubt
Doubt is a central theme for solitary twins! We doubt a lot, especially ourselves. We are great self-doubters. We tend to doubt where we shouldn’t, and we tend not to doubt where we should. We’ve turned the whole thing on its head. This is deeply engrained in our being and feels as a natural skin to us. But is not. It is a second skin. We are wounded in the first skin, and we have chosen to put another skin over it. But that doesn’t help. If you read here, you have the chance to heal the wound in your original skin! Take care of your doubts, sort them out and make them your allies! For more in-depth reading, see Harness your doubt!
Energetical sensitivity
We are not only bodily, social and psychological beings, but also energetic beings! If we overlook this fact, chaos is within our fingertips. Solitary twins are highly sensitive in terms of energy. The short formula “Either we deal with it or it deals with us” fits very well here. Dealing with it means to be aware of it. If we are aware of how this energy affects our lives, that’s half the battle. The importance of this fact cannot be overestimated. We ourselves find it natural because we have never experienced it any other way. Others can’t tell us, they do not notice. It is therefore difficult to gain a perspective on this sensitivity. But it is vital that we do so! For more in-depth reading, see Seize your energetical sensitivity!
Timeless dimension
We are not only bodily, social, psychological and energetical beings, but also timeless beings! Timeless is spiritual, but so are physical, social, psychological and energetical. More to that in the references. If we overlook the fact, that we’re timeless beings, not much of anything makes sense here! Then there is no connection to anything, right? But what we go through as solitary twins simply goes beyond the scope of short-sighted psychology. Psychology is important, see below, but as a solitary twin it is not sufficient. When we look at it with open look and in a grounded way, what do we see? We cannot deal with it without taking the timeless dimension into account.
This dimension is natural, and you are already in touch with it. To be precise, you have never left. Perhaps you have the feeling that you want to unfold even more in this direction. Get in touch with your timeless twin, she or he is your first port of call for all insights concerning these topics. For more in-depth reading, see Plunge into timelessness.
Psychologically
On these pages I stress the energetical sensitivity and timeless dimension first. I do this because, in my experience, many solitary twins overlook these two important topics. Of course, there is not much to read on these topics either. But psychology is a solid ground with precious tools for dealing with solitary twin issues. No doubt about that. As solitary twins we have to develop our personality like any other, maybe even more. Because, we need to be grounded in time. When we try to escape from time and lose ourselves in layers of energy and timelessness, our timeless twin mutes the connection. We have to do our homework in time, so to speak. Psychological tools help us to do this.
Please don’t emphasise homework too much, those days are hopefully over if you’re reading along here. Solitary twins tend to do too much of them. When duty becomes free skating with pleasure, we are in the right place. Developing your personality is the key to being a door frame with awareness. More in-depth to that will come.
Bodily
Our body is a tremendous source of timeless wisdom. Despite the fact that it is closely linked to time. As solitary twins, our body remembers the beginning of our time here, when we connected with it. This is a very helpful source for recognising our dream of the womb and waking up from it. Focusing on the body immediately brings us into the here and now. This is a key in meditation. The body is much closer to the higher mind than the problem-solving mind is. It reacts quickly to what is. Whether we notice it or not is the question. More on this in other places such as workshops or tutorials on specific topics.
As promised there is more to come here.
Reading suggestions from here:
Want to ..
- test? See Twin test : Are you a solitary twin?
- check twin facts? See Twin matters!
- grip your doubts? See Harness your doubt!
- wake up? See Wake up from the dream of the womb!
- get clear? See Seize your energetical sensitivity!
- get a view beyond? See Plunge into timelessness
Image sources: With thanks to CDD20, Mike, insspirito, Helga, Nida Suleyman, ddzphoto, Harrison Haines, Lucas Pezeta, George Desipris, cottonbro studio and Nurefşan KOŞAR.